is.it.over-> ?

[xx the brownster]

From: Whats there to SEE?

Ghost

We do everything for a reason, even if we don't know it yet

The fur lay flat on his shinny, forest-colored back as he heard the apprentice yell after his darting, fast-moving body. Ghost abruptly stopped, sensing that she was the only one to tear after him, and the rest were still in their present spot, laughing and smiling that they had scared away the loner. Fools, he though to himself. I'm not an idiot. But soon, they will understand. However that wasn't his first concern, first it was to find out what this young cat wanted. This could prove interesting.

"Can I help you?" he asked coldly, letting his annoyance take over his body. The cool cat he was a few seconds ago had gone, and he was more than annoyed, not so much with the apprentices, but with himself. He knew he really couldn't have taken all of them on, maybe two, but not all four-- he wasn't nearly big enough. He was only a few moons older than they most likely were anyway.

His dark blue eyes looked right at the bounding cat as his sheathed and unsheathed his claws on his tiny, brown paws.

[Burningwing]

Ferretpaw
Shadowclan apprentice





"Hey! Wait there! Wai-"

With a soft mreow, Ferretpaw skidded to a halt, chunk of soil and moss flying up away from her unsheathed paws as though scared of being scared by her long ivory claws. two long skid marks were visible behind her paws, even through the growing darkness as bulking storm clouds grouped overhead like birds flocking together for migration. She had almost crashed into the loner, now only a few kitten-steps away from his face, her breath rushed out in a cloud that hung in the air and vanished. Embarrassment flushed her ears and nose, turning the barren skin of them dark and ruby red. She was so close that she could smell the scent of wilderness and pine trees on his fur so vividly, and feel the billows of his breath frosting the tips of her russet fur.

Her lime green eyes grew wide and innocent like a young girl faced with an accusation. She studied his forest-coloured pelt, comparing it to her own russet tabby pelt that melted into a rusty cream tone. His pelt was dark while hers was light. It made some sort of complicated sense, seeing as he was a loner, all by himself for the most part, while she was safe among the warm pelts of other apprentices. She felt intimidated by his, he seemed to tower over her, though the height distance was only different by a few inches. She winced as his hard words made contact with her mind, tied with annoyance like frost laced along the edge of a twig. Suddenly, whatever it was she had been about to say was lost in her swirling thoughts.

Confusion now dominated her facade, twisting her wide eyes into narrowed pits of pain that stared out from her slanted brow. " I-i'm sorry. Did i- did I do something to upset you?" The thought of causing any cat an inconvenience made her lips turn down at the corner. It was like the young girl was now putting on her last pleading attempt to turn the accusation from going against her. Whatever it had been she had planned to say had fallen off the tip of her tongue, and now she was left grasping to tie the strings of this conversation together. " Would you oppose to me asking what you name might be?" Ferretpaw's voice was barely audible, her face staring down at her scuffling paws.

What had made her do this? The tom was a loner after all, and older then here, rising over her with much more muscle and experience then the meager amount she had. He could easily snap Ferretpaw's thing body into a crippled mess of sinew and flesh if he really felt like doing that. now that Eelpaw wasn't standing confidently at her side, she was utterly lost and breakable, a glass figure in a field of stones.

[xx the brownster]

Ghost

It's amazing what we can accomplish through silence[/center]

"I-i'm sorry. Did i- did I do something to upset you?"

Ghost only stared at her a moment before rolling his green orbs and scrunching up his face in even more annoyance. "My dear, you kicked me out of a very comfortable space. Yes, I am annoyed, and yes, you inconvenienced me. I am surprised you even came running after me after you and your little buddies decided to pry me from my sitting place. It's not like I had stolen prey or attacked your Clan, is it?." He paused. "No, I didn't think so," he said sternly before she could answer his previous question.

For a slight half a second he felt a bit ashamed of himself, scaring the she-cat. However the sniveling thing had run him away. Ghost didn't see her standing up to them... no, she had decided to show no kindness. Why should he show it to her? This cat couldn't stand up for herself; she needed to learn that you can't have it both ways. Never.

"Would you oppose me asking you what your name might be?"

"Does it matter what my name is? I can not see myself coming around here anytime soon. I thought ShadowClan was the kindest to loners. I suppose I shouldn't have listened to other cats." He paused again, this time sighing before he continued. "My name is Ghost. Originally Forestpaw, an apprentice like yourself. I left. Clan life isn't for me... but of course the Clan cats just can't see its not for everyone, can they? Your way is perfect," he snarled sarcastically. His claws had become unsheathed. She was no threat.[/size]

[Burningwing]

Ferretpaw
Shadowclan apprentice






"My dear, you kicked me out of a very comfortable space. Yes, I am annoyed, and yes, you inconvenienced me. I am surprised you even came running after me after you and your little buddies decided to pry me from my sitting place. It's not like I had stolen prey or attacked your Clan, is it?."

Ferretpaw cringed, scrunching her nose on one side in the funny way she did when she was thinking hard. It wasn't her fault that Ryepaw and Lizardpaw were about to drive him out when Ferretpaw peeked innocently through the bushes. And it certainly wasn't her intention to have her brother come barreling into her like e meteor, then fly out into the clearing and start hissin' and snarling at the forest-coloured tom he found there confronting the two young she-cats. Her russet pelt prickled uncomfortably under the loner's intense stare. His green eyes burned forcefully into her own, lighter lime orbs. It felt as though static was snapping between the two different hued eyes, unable to flow into one of the other. Finally Ferretpaw broke her gaze, dropping it to her paws.

She etched the petite, lightly striped shape of them with her line of sight, unsheathing her claws until her claws dug fiercely into the damp peat moss that was lining the underside of her paws. It wasn't like it damaged the moss though, Ferretpaw's claws were dull and short, unkept with the point that might usually be pointed on other cats, rounded and blunt. Now was one of the times that Ferretpaw hated how her claws were so useless, naturally un-sharp, more like a dogs then a cats. At least her teeth were sharp, more needle-like then stabbing canines, but at least it was painful when they dug into your fur. She blinked, corners of her mouth curving up a smidget. At least she wasn't completely helpless.

Does it matter what my name is? I can not see myself coming around here anytime soon. I thought ShadowClan was the kindest to loners. I suppose I shouldn't have listened to other cats." "My name is Ghost. Originally Forestpaw, an apprentice like yourself. I left. Clan life isn't for me... but of course the Clan cats just can't see its not for everyone, can they? Your way is perfect,"

At this the young she-cat turned rigid, tail stuck out stiffly like a plank and legs straight and stiff beneath her slim body. Her whiskers were the only part of her that moved, twitching, wriggling around on her cheeks while her eyes were locked on Ghost's face like a chain had held her face in place with the key that worked the lock thrown out the window. Then she was moving again, tail lashing angrily behind her, the creamy white tip like a lantern in the growing darkness. " Perfect?" She hissed, her words slithering out of her throat. " Sometimes I wish I could become a loner, all the rules that we have to obey, don't do this, you must do that." Ferretpaw shook her head forcefully before staring back at Ghost, full of distress. " It isn't like I would chose to drive you away! I know that you didn't do anything wrong!"

[xx the brownster]

Ghost

Say what you mean, mean what you say

"Perfect? ... Sometimes I wish I could become a loner, all the rules that we have to obey, don't do this, you must do that... It isn't like I would chose to drive you away! I know that you didn't do anything."

Ghost's ears perked up as the rather bold and loud apprentice squeaked her reply back at him."Why, dear, there may be some hope for you yet. It's nice to see they haven't brainwashed all the apprentices... yet. However, will you be saying the same thing in a few moons when you are up on the highrock, boldly admitting your love for the Clan, and I shall be a distant memory. The loner that you talked to who quelled your inner voice telling you that Clan life wasn't for you because I will be your example to future generations that you need Clan life." The ending was such as the ending of a large speech presented by someone of importance in the Clan's long, somewhat dark history full of war and terror along with happiness and bravery.

There was a long, dark pause the few whiskers on Ghost's face twitched with some antsy anticipation of what Ferretpaw would say. In a twisted way he had become fascinated once again with something. His fascination with the answers he almost received from Lizzardpaw was dying down as he fancied hearing what another vulnerable apprentice had to say to his rather long bickering and arguing.

Nature had began to set in place it's opinion of Ghost. As if it was channeling his inner thoughts, the wind began to flow gracefully and smoothly while the air seemed to thicken with a light mist as he stood at the border of marsh and trees. [/size]

[Burningwing]

Ferretpaw
Shadowclan apprentice






."Why, dear, there may be some hope for you yet. It's nice to see they haven't brainwashed all the apprentices... yet. However, will you be saying the same thing in a few moons when you are up on the highrock, boldly admitting your love for the Clan, and I shall be a distant memory. "

Ferretpaw blinked fiercely, her lime-green eyes glaring at Ghost, trying...hoping to burn a large round hole through his forest-coloured pelt. She could almost imagine it, thinking of how the edges of it would be tinged black with cinders from the heat and intensity of her glare. His words had awoken something asleep inside her, and now she thought to herself. If she really didn't believe that the rules in the warrior code were fair, why would she pledge her loyalty to it when she became a warrior? She dug her fangs down on her lip at this through. What would, could she do? Most likely she would be like a tree with something alien stuck to it, slowly over time her bark would mold over, around it till it was burrowed deep into her, deep were it would be untouched, unknown.

"The loner that you talked to who quelled your inner voice telling you that Clan life wasn't for you because I will be your example to future generations that you need Clan life."

Need clan life? Nausea rose like a bile in the young cats throat, revolting her, rising to overwhelm her. Did you really need clan life? Did she really need the trifle to obey every order her leader gave her? It seemed like so much...to much, how could she possible deal with all of those rules? It would be easy for her brother, he lived to obey the rules, lived to be the rules and enforce them to anyone who dared to defy the code that had been handed down cat after cat for more generations then were countable. But Ferretpaw...Ferretpaw wanted to do her own thing, she wanted to explore over all the territories, she wanted to travel over the forest, moors and river...And she didn't want to interrogate loners that had done nothing wrong.

Ghost...he had opened a door in her mind that had remained locked for a long time, and now Ferretpaw was dealing with the things that came out. It was painful for her. She wanted to be loyal, she really did, but how was she supposed to do all these things that she did not want to do? Gritting her teeth together, she snapped her eyelids shut, squeezing them until more bright spots blossomed in her vision. " I...i shouldn't be talking to you, I'll probably spill out all sorts of thing that I shouldn't be telling you about, an-and..." Ferretpaw ceased her rambling as a sharp pain exploded in her temples, and she fell to the ground, her russet pelt fluffed out with pain. She had always been prone to headache attacks when she got stressed. " Errgh-Er-er-er!!" She growled in pain.

[xx the brownster]

Ghost

Life is confusing. Thats a fact.

" I...I shouldn't be talking to you, I'll probably spill out all sorts of thing that I shouldn't be telling you about, an-and.... Errgh-Er-er-er!!"

A small, rather evil smirk crept up on Ghost's face as he looked at the apprentice, who was having problems spilling out words she so desperately wanted to say. His eyes looked right into her very own bright orbs. There was no doubt by his expression on his complex face that he had enjoyed getting her all worked up. Although he spoke the truth-- he always did-- Ghost never felt like sparing anyone, he still felt like saying it just to see her reaction-- to get some sick revenge because she had been part of the few apprentices who had kicked him out.

"Don't get yourself worked up over there," he said mockingly, the constant smirk now taking over his face. His face was showing a sour expression, but an expression that had once seen love, but now only say hatred and anger-- and self pity. What had happened to this poor cat to make him hate life and Clan cats? Why did Ghost feel like getting revenge on everything and everyone that hurt him? It was as if acceptance was not enough for this distraught cat-- there was something else, something more evil inside his heart and soul taking over and dividing up his spirit.

All of a sudden his expression change, it was as if the complex situation inside his soul was too much for him-- there was a constant pain in his heart. What made his life worth living? What would he do with the rest of his life? Could he really spend the rest of his life tormenting poor cats such as Ferretpaw?


[/size]

[Burningwing]

Ferretpaw
Shadowclan apprentice






The pain was easing. Ferretpaw could feel it slowly dissolving away, as though the pressure that had been compressing her head like a hand, was now melting away as her deep breathes jutted in and out from her lungs, her small pink tongue hanging over the ridge of her teeth, narrow chest heaving in and out until the rhythm evened out, and each other the breathes she drew were slow and steady, relishing the moment where no pain stabbed through her mind and broke her thoughts. Her mind was blank, blank until her lime-green eyes flickered open, and she saw Ghost standing smugly there, His forest-coloured pelt seeming to meld into the background. Then, there was anger, rushing and explosive in her mind.

"Don't get yourself worked up over there,"

This was unusual for Ferretpaw...not often would this kind of rage consume her, but now she could feel it, pulsing through her veins, burning on the surface of her skin. She felt as though she was glowing red like lava, steam streaming from every surface of her body into the air. It was strange...but welcome. It was keeping the stress and the pain away. It urged her to leap forward, claws unsheathed and cause Ghost the same amount of pain, perhaps with a bit more, he would have to pay interest. Sense caught her in time though. Telling her that although she was faster, he was stronger, and her knobby claws would hardly claw through his skin, maybe dig up clumps of his fur, but not skin. So instead, she took a deep breathe and talked.

" Why do you get so much delight out of causing Innocent cats pain? It wasn't me who drove you away, it was Ryepaw, Lizardpaw and Eelpaw. It was not me, I was still in the bushes. Or perhaps your eyes arn't well enough to tell cats apart from each other?" This thought made her frown. However modest she was, she took pride for her pelt, russet tabby on top and fading to a yellowish-cream, and it made her nose wrinkle to think that she couldn't be told apart from other cats. " What made you this way to appreciate evil and pain?" Ferretpaw stared forward, her eyes narrowed into thin black lines. Perhaps Ferretpaw wasn't suited well to clan life, but even as a loner she wouldn't be so gleeful to cause another cat pain. But maybe that was just her.

[xx the brownster]

signed Ghost
survival is pain





The cat could only blindly stare the apprentice, his mouth wide open, agape, and no words spilling out of it. His red tongue was not moving. His eyes were barely moving. For once everything was stand still as he was unsure what to say. What could he say? He moved, hoping a reposition might help fill his head with thoughts, sounds, and feelings. But nothing helped-- nothing came out of his empty head. Everything was empty from the bottom of his toes to the top of his cranium.

"I see, I see," he finally sputtered out of his mouth, now staring back at her. "Well you, see I go by association, as many cats do. You hang with them, you are part of them, and you dear, seemed to be hanging with them." His mouth now stopped, not letting another world slip from his mouth for a moment as he took a breather to recompose himself and think about her next question.

"What made me this way? Hah! What a question..." A question Ghost was totally unsure how to answer. How did he answer that? Now Ghost was never one for lying, so that option would not do. What about telling her the whole truth? Nah, no one knew everything, not even his dear sister, so telling her the filtered version would just have to satisfy her and him.

"Well, at a young age I was stolen from my parents who were Clan cats, then raised by a rogue, then realized I had no interest in being a rogue so I traveled around, not really doing much but learning from other Clans and tribes outside of this small forest. You know, these Clans have closed them in, so not many cats leave and explore the outside. Really sad if you ask me. Anyway, in doing this, I learned the harsh cruelties of the world, decided the only way to survive was to beat the pain, and did so." This explanation seemed fine for Ghost has he let his forest colored tail snap back and forward, making a loud whipping noise and most likely scaring away any prey that was not already scared away by the bickering and tension of the two opposite cats.

[Burningwing]

Ferretpaw
Shadowclan apprentice

It was hard to reckon with a conclusion like that, and Ferretpaw was left to stare sinsterly at the forest-coloured tom, forced to stay frozen in place like a statue, listening to the click of Ghost's tail beating against the slight breeze that whispered through the canopy, sending an icy gust through the strands of Ferretpaw's russet tabby pelt. Darkness was looming threateningly on the horizon, dark swaths of clouds like angry hornets wafting through the light indigo sky, grey and black like a bruised eye. Snow was on the way. There would be now chance to get out of the storm before it hit, so Ferretpaw would just remain there, continuing this verbal battle between the two cats, the clan omega and the loner, but it seemed Ferretpaw was losing her ground.

"Well, at a young age I was stolen from my parents who were Clan cats, then raised by a rogue, then realized I had no interest in being a rogue so I traveled around, not really doing much but learning from other Clans and tribes outside of this small forest. You know, these Clans have closed them in, so not many cats leave and explore the outside. Really sad if you ask me. Anyway, in doing this, I learned the harsh cruelties of the world, decided the only way to survive was to beat the pain, and did so."

What could she say to rival that? Even as a few chilly flakes of white drifted down to speckle her fur, her mind was writhing and struggling to come up with some brilliant comeback, but that seemed impossible. So she meerly went with the first words to be flung from her mouth. " ...The only way to survive is to beat the pain? What do you mean by that? Are you saying you simply hurt others before they can hurt you? How would that get you through life? If you just hurt everyone before you got a chance to actually know them, then wouldn't you never have an friends? And alliances?" Everything was coming out like a question, and Ferretpaw's high-pitched, girly voice was quavering and breaking unevenly. How embarassing.

She continued however, in a slightly stronger voice, her lime-green eyes staring straight into Ghost's darker green orbs, " I never wanted to hurt you, but you hurt me, so what choice would I have but to defend myself?" There hadn't been much meaning to her last sentance, it was a meek attempt to ty up her small speech, and now she was left to stare sheepishly at the older tom, breath swirling out through the frosty air.

[/blockquote] [/blockquote]

[xx the brownster]

signed Ghost
pain comes in all shapes and sizes

" ...The only way to survive is to beat the pain? What do you mean by that? Are you saying you simply hurt others before they can hurt you? How would that get you through life? If you just hurt everyone before you got a chance to actually know them, then wouldn't you never have an friends? And alliances?"

"Haha, my dear, you just rush into conclusions, as you always do. Rush... rush.. rush... No." His thoughts inside his mind stopped for a moment, as he began to become unsure of what to say, which was not usually the case. "I hurt others because they will hurt me. It's a major difference. I don't want to get to know anyone," he spat back. "No one is worth getting to know. You Clan cats care for no one-- no one! I don't have frien--" Ghost stopped for a moment. Did he really have no friends? What about Brownclaw? No-- dead cats did not count, did they? There was Brownstar, but she wasn't his friend... just someone that he had a connection with. There was no friendship between siblings.

The weather was beginning to change was the temperature had dropped since he had been out there. ShadowClan had not many warm trees to protect them, and the marshes were most certainly cold this time of year. The cold had never bothered the mixed colored cat before but now-- it was bothering him. Why? His fur was thick, always had been. He let out a low whimper as a big whip of wind hit his body, making all his hairs stand on end for all of two seconds.

"I hurt you?!" He said, letting out a very loud laugh, most likely scaring away half the forest. "No, my dear, I did no such thing. I simply defended myself from some nasty apprentices who think they'll matter to the clan once their injured. Hah-- no, I did not hurt you. I haven't touched you. I simply was exploring, got yelled at by your friend Lizardpaw, and then was chased by you!"

[Burningwing]

F E R R E T P A W

"I hurt you?!"

"No, my dear, I did no such thing. I simply defended myself from some nasty apprentices who think they'll matter to the clan once their injured. Hah-- no, I did not hurt you. I haven't touched you. I simply was exploring, got yelled at by your friend Lizardpaw, and then was chased by you!"

Ferretpaw bristled angrily, her tabby fur spiking up and a few flakes of snow fell from her pelt. Her lime green eyes flashed in the dying light before she replied again, struggling to fight back the headache that was starting to throb at the back of her mind. " You may not have ment to hurt me, but you did." She flared her nostrils fiercly, but it had little effect, her small size didn't fully...exaggerate the gesture. She didn't have much else to say to Ghost, and the cold wind that gusted around her was urging her to run back to the camp and snuggle up with her long-haired brother. She shifted her paws, trying to keep them from freezing over, but ice was spiking the fur on them.

" I'm not going to stand here and argue with you all day, Ghost." She murmured, glaring balefully at the grey sky. " Its starting to become a bad storm, and it wouldn't be reasonable to stay out here any longer. I wouldn't, however, suggest staying on Shadowclan territory during the storm, why don't you go and terrorize Thunderclan for awhile?" Ferretpaw's breath swirled out in an abstract pattern of steam that was instantly swiped away by the wind.

"Well..." Ferretpaw shifted from paw to paw, before glancing up at Ghost. " Im leaving now, so...bye..." With that, she rose to her paws and turned to leave the clearing.

[/blockquote]